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Learn to accept and love yourself

Learn to accept and love yourself

You've probably seen this saying a lot: "You must first love yourself."

What does that signify, though? Is the goal to warm you up with hot chocolate while you're cold? Is it to buy you a new outfit whenever you want one? Does it allow you to act however and whenever you please? Is it about dressing warmly when the weather is frightful?

Learning to treat oneself with love is the same as treating your child with love.

You still have an Inner Child inside of you even as an adult, which I suppose you are. These feelings are yours. You still behave like a youngster between the ages of 3 and 4 at that level. Your emotions are not age- or maturity-related. You can, however, mature. You can develop your skills in handling and respecting them. You can discover how to look after your inner child.

You attempt to live in an adult world like a 4-year-old child when you are unaware of your Inner Child. You feel completely alone, terrified of the large, dangerous world outside, unsure of what to do, where to look for assistance, or how to take care of yourself. This is an extremely challenging method of operation. You'll constantly experience anxiety, doubt, and fatigue. Trying to make it as a youngster in a world full of adults is difficult. Most of the time, you'll feel frustrated, scared, and lost.

How come? because you are not cared for by your inner Little Child.

Let's assume that you are Charlotte. 42 years old is your age. Your inner Charlotte is present. 4 years old. Little Charlotte will feel neglected if you are preoccupied with taking care of other people, business, transportation, and a thousand other daily tasks in the outer world. You will be worn out every night and cry in your bed if you are constantly rushing to assist others and see to their needs. You may occasionally witness tantrums. You'll feel really irritated for no apparent reason (but there is one, and it's a major one!).

Your Inner Child is attempting to attract your attention with all these strong feelings.

Imagine that you also have a young daughter named Charlotte who is four years old, in addition to your children, spouse, colleagues, parents, and friends. She is never noticed. Nobody looks after her. You yell at her, "Shut up!" whenever she makes an attempt to talk and attract attention. "I have to look after my parents, my job, my spouse, my papers, my friends, my other children, and my house," you say. I can't give you my time.

How will she feel, in your opinion? Do you anticipate what she'll do? She would first try to catch your attention by displaying strong emotions. She will frequently weep, scream, and yell; occasionally, she may even become hostile. You may believe that you are upset with the outer world, but really, your inner child is upset with YOU! Because you don't care about her, she is upset and angry. You behave as though she don't exist! Nothing is worse than denying the existence of our Inner Child. Living as though WE don't exist is what this entails.


Being disloyal to oneself is the worst feeling in the world. There is nothing worse than this!

How many times have we disregarded our feelings in order to appease someone else? How many times have we told our inner child to "shut up," "you are not important," "go away," or "I don't want to hear you, I don't want to see you"? horrible, isn't it? And we do this each time we give in to someone else's wants before our own.

What will this tiny Charlotte within do? She'll eventually give up. She will eventually give up attempting to express her emotions after much effort. She will get unhappy and say: "It doesn't matter; she doesn't love me, she doesn't want to take care of me, and I'm not worth it." She will grow extremely weary of this all.


Of course you'll believe that other people—your job, your kids, your husband, your parents—are to blame for your depression.

Nobody is at blame. However, you must learn how to care for this Inner Child who is harmed by your neglect of her.


There is one more tool available to draw your attention if things continue to make you depressed: tiny Charlotte will get unwell. Or maybe she'll have a mishap. Perhaps in this way, Charlotte the adult will finally learn to pay attention to her Inner Kid, which is just as real as a genuine child made of flesh and blood, if not more so.


You must develop the skills necessary to be a kind parent to yourself.

Why does that matter?

 You must first create an Inner Mother. You can use your mother as an example if you were fortunate enough to have a loving, caring mother. If not, you must create this Inner Mother—your feminine, nurturing energy by inventing something new. Your inner child should always be questioned by your inner mother whenever you are feeling something. Pay attention to what your inner child is saying. The conversation then continues. Come hither, the inner mother calls. Come into my arms; I adore you just the way you are. I adore you unconditionally.

By doing that, the intensity of the feelings will almost certainly lessen. Following that, you say, "I get it." These are crucial statements because we frequently struggle to accept the sensations we experience and instead try to conceal or deny them, which only makes them heavier. "I know, my baby, come here and rest in your Mother's arms, I love you," she said.

After reflecting on these thoughts and emotions for a moment, ask: "What do you need?"

Whatever the child says, you reply, "We'll ask your father about it."

Your Inner Father, who is there to look out for you and represent you in the outer world, now has a job to do. You wouldn't assign a four-year-old to negotiate a pay rise at work, settle a dispute at school, or deal with your neighbors, would you? Why do you attempt it, then? Whatever you need to accomplish in the outside world, send your Inner Father to handle it. Your inner child, also known as intuition, is where your masculine energy, also known as your Inner Father, is located. This energy empowers you to make choices, take action, listen to your intuition, and bring your child's wishes into the world.

Imagine that your Inner Child stays at home with his Mother, who takes care of his feelings ("I understand you're worried..."), and that your Inner Father (another part of your existence) goes out there to act when your Child has a need, such as to call someone or to go someplace to organism things. Your Inner Father is the aspect of you that can deal with stress, take initiative, resolve problems, and do anything else that has to do with the outer world. You will need to construct and develop it if that component is lacking as a result of the fact that you yourself lacked an effective role model when you were younger.

Of course, you are made up of your Inner Child, your Mother, and your Father. You are responsible for everything. It only serves as a framework for comprehending your internal processes and learning to appreciate yourself.

 Listening to your Inner Child, taking his feelings seriously, comprehending them, and acting on them are all signs that you are loving yourself. Every morning when you open your eyes, every night when you go to sleep, and each time you experience an emotion, loving yourself means having this conversation with yourself.


Self-love entails forging a committed relationship with oneself.

It involves building a caring family for yourself. You won't ever feel lonely again. You're three already! Describe it as your Trinity. You will now always travel with your Inner Family wherever you go. You're not by yourself. You are safeguarded and adored. You pay heed to your needs and take care of the adorable child who has been waiting impatiently for your love and attention.


This is personal healing.

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